Losing parents is one of the most emotional moments in one’s lifetime. Even as universal as it is, 44.2% of adults have had to endure losing one parent or even both parents, as U.S. Census Bureau reports indicate.

When the time comes to face writing your parent’s obituary, it could feel overwhelming; knowing how to write an obituary for a parent means knowing how to balance emotional challenges with practical priorities to write a beautiful tribute to their memory.

Why Writing a Parent’s Obituary Is Emotionally Challenging

​​Composing an obituary for your parents is an emotional challenge, HonorYou highlight this by saying:

“The responsibilities that follow the loss of a loved one can be overwhelming. You have to organize funeral responsibilities and juggle your emotions simultaneously.” 

Along with those emotional challenges, grief statistics indicate that 10% to 20% of those grieving develop complicated grief, and that’s enough to make even ordinary activities too daunting to start.

This stress comes from several areas. One, you’re being tasked with wrapping your lifetime into several paragraphs. Two, you’re confronted face-to-face with your personal loss as you try to respect your parents’ legacy. 

The overwhelming majority of adults are left puzzled as to what to leave in and what to leave out in obituary, fearing they will forget something critical or even a family member. The emotional weight of this responsibility is normal and shared by the millions who face this task each year.

What to Include in the Obituary

When learning how to write your parent’s obituary, understanding what details to include will make your writing unique. 

Essential Information to Include:

Category	Information to Include
Basic Details	Full name
	Age at time of death
	Date and location of death
	Date and place of birth
Life Story Elements	Educational background
	Achievements
	Professional accomplishments
	Military service (if applicable)
	Marriage details and spouse information
Personal Touches	Hobbies and interests
	Community involvement
	Religious or organizational affiliations
	Character traits that defined them
	Special accomplishments or recognitions
Service Information	Date, time, and location of funeral or memorial services
	Burial or cremation details
	Information about flowers, donations, or memorial contributions

Balancing Formal Details with Personal Memories

Most essential to writing a good obituary is to strike a balance between fact and personal details, which will preserve your parent’s special personality. 

Begin writing an obituary with formal details such as name, date of birth, place of birth and then insert individualized details that will make your parent’s obituary unique. Do not say, “He liked reading newspapers,” but “He read newspapers with enthusiasm, especially British newspapers, because he thought they were better written than American newspapers.”

Consider also including:

• A favorite saying or piece of advice they often shared
• Their role in family traditions
• How they showed love to family members
• Community impact 
• Unique talents 

Remember that with obituaries, you want to pack more meaning into fewer words. 

Examples of Obituary Openings for a Parents

Your parents’ obituaries’ first sentence defines the whole tone. Here are some approaches to consider.

• Traditional Obituary: Anna, 78, passed away January 15, 2024, with loved ones around her.
  
• Celebratory Opening: Robert celebrates his life well-lived as he passed away peacefully on January 15, 20245, aged 82.
  
• Character Based Introductions: Mary Davis, loving mother, grandmother, and former school teacher who had touched thousands of people’s lives, passed into eternal rest on January 15, 2024.
  
• Legacy Oriented Introductory Statement: With love in his heart, James Mitchell, proud dad to four and grandfather to nine, finished his time here on earth January 15, 2024, leaving his legacy and love.

Tips for Writing When Grieving

Composing an obituary while grieving is challenging in its own way; here are some tips to make it a bit easier.

Practical strategies:

• Do not rush: Most funeral homes and newspapers understand that families will need time to write obituaries that are worth their parents legacy.
  
• Do not write it alone: ask your parents, siblings, other family members for help.
  
• Write in stages: Place necessary information first and then personal details in later edits.
  
• Consult a Professional: Honor You provide professional obituary writing, noting that professional obituary writers will take everything into account and write a draft that will match your parent’s legacy.
  
• Utilize Templates: Utilizing a template to follow will help lessen decision-making while also simultaneously helping grief.

Mistakes to Avoid When Writing a Parent’s Obituary

Neglecting mistakes will diminish your parents’ tribute or cause family conflict. Here are some errors you must avoid.

Main Errors to Avoid:

1. Over-Including Family Names: Do not include every family name because there is a high chance you might write it wrong. Use close family members and then add “and many other loving relatives and friends.”
   
2. Inconsistent Timeline: Ensure that dates and timelines align throughout the obituary.
   
3. Putting achievements as priority: You have to balance professional success with personal traits and relationships.
   
4. skipping the proofreading: Misspellings, particularly people’s names, cause permanent damage.
   
5. Being too General: Specific details help readers connect with your parent’s story and memory.

Templates and Examples for Mothers and Fathers

Having a template for your obituary will assist you in writing one, and here are some examples you could use for your draft.

Template for Mother:

[Full name], [age], of [city], passed peacefully on [date] at [location]. Born [birth date] at [birthplace] to [parents’ names]. Graduated from [school] and had a career/education in [career/education field]. Married to [spouse name] on [date] at [location]. They have [number] children: [names]. [Personal traits and hobbies]. Services will be [service details].

Father’s Day Template:

[Full name], [age], of [city], returned home to the Lord on [date]. Born [birth date] in [birthplace] to [names of parents], he [early life information]. Graduated [school] and [military service/vocation]. He married his sweetheart, [spouse name], on [date], and had [number] years together. [Hobby and personal information]. He enjoyed being the loving dad to [children’s names]. [Service information].

How and Where to Share the Obituary

Once you have composed your parent’s obituary, spreading it in the appropriate manner enables their story to reach every individual.

Standard Sharing Mechanisms:

• Local newspapers (particularly at hometown and current residence)
• Funeral home websites
• Church bulletins or newsletters
• Alumni or professional newspapers

Sharing Files Electronically

• Social media sites
• Family blogs or websites
• Email to relatives and friends

An online approach is particularly valuable if family and friends live at distances or otherwise are not physically able to come to service. The cyberspace also gives a permanent remembrance that may be viewed at any time.

Finding Support During This Difficult Time

Learning how to write your parent’s obituary is hard. You are celebrating your parent’s life and coming to terms with your loss. Don’t hurry, seek help as needed, and above all, do try to write an obituary worthy of your parent’s legacy as much as your feelings will permit.

Whether writing your own or obtaining professional help, your job is the same: to write your own tribute celebrating your parent’s life and to tell others of the amazing life they lived. With 1.5 million kids losing one or sometimes two parents before reaching their 15th birthday, and millions more facing this loss as adults, you are not alone in this journey of honoring a parent’s legacy through words.